HMS ~ Monday 11 August

DALE
Evicted, Friday 8th August. Good.

DARNELL
Darnell is so full of angst and pain and insecurities, but he is also intelligent and has his finger on the pulse of what is going on in the house. He is so loveable and engenders both a need to protect in many of us and a knowledge that he would be an A1 protector. He has very low self esteem and I sincerely hope that when he leaves the house, hopefully as the winner, he will realise he is such a worthy person and that knowledge will help him to feel much better.

This week he was once again lead on by Sara and stupidly fell for the sweet talk. He ended up following her around like a love sick puppy for a time. And then during a late night session of Rex pushing peoples' buttons in the luxury bedroom (while the divide was still up) Rex said to Sara to sleep in Darnell's bed to which she replied 'no, he would try to have sex with me'. Darnell was absolutely outraged at this and at last saw the underbelly of Sara. He was so insulted and hurt and made it known. Sara then denied she had said this, even though Stuart, Rex, Mo and Darnell all heard her and she eventually had to say she might have said it but she didn't mean it. Too late, Darnell was not for turning. And that's the thing about Darnell, he is honourable and though of course he fancied Sara, he would not want her to think that he would take advantage of her (or anyone).

KAT
Another week, another doubt. I so want to like Kat as I did in the earlier days but sometimes I wonder if she is indeed the Kat we see. Yes, she continues to talk sense to her friends and support them at all times but there is a niggle with me that she is actually quite mercenary. I hope I am wrong and she is just being transparent in her desire to be in the final.

She had the most dreadful week as a hell hm this week. Her hell hms were Mikey and Nicole and as hell hms have to do all the cooking and cleaning this meant that Kat carried the can for the week and as a result at the end of the week, ended up looking wane and not at all her former chirpy self. Mikey being blind, tried his best to help with duties but obviously some jobs are beyond him and even those he does, he doesn't do very well. This is not laziness but rather that he is unable to do certain things. Nicole on the other hand, though well able really did not want to be bothered with any cleaning or cooking, fully supported by Rex. Had I been Kat, I would have thrown the towel in and taken to my bed with the sore knee she had and left the whole lot to look after themselves. But in fairness to Kat she soldiered on and did the best she could. I suppose it is understandable that her best friend and hoh, Rachel, passed hell on the cake making task to allow Kat to get out of the kitchen and flower again.

LISA
Give Lisa an inch and she is off in full bitch mode again. She is a very bitter woman and starts the back biting in such a sneaky way. She will comment on some hm in such a way that can't be taken as a slight if the person to whom she is speaking does not take it as such, but if a hm has a gripe agains the person mentioned and happens to say something detrimental about said person, then Lisa's floodgates of bile spill forth. You try to cut Lisa some slack but time after time she reverts to form and shows that she wants nothing more than a good bitch practically about anyone.

She is just like her 'boyfriend' Mario too, she has done everything and is talented at everything ~ in her mind. The truth, just like Mario, is that she is basically crap at everything, save exercising. They are well matched and if Mario does propose as he has been trumpeting about any magazine or paper that will listen to him, then they will make a perfect couple and are well matched. They even look like a female and male version of some a plastic fantastic couple invented by some crazed body builder on anabolic steroids.

MIKEY
Mikey has gone up a bit in my estimation. He can be funny and he can cut through crap that is thrown at him and certainly since he came out from the shadow of Mario, he has come into his own. But the one thing that throws Mikey back to the bottom is his willingness to be sucked into Lisa's theories on hms and her backbiting, and he shows himself to be a willing and very able partner to these sessions it must be said. Mikey could be so much better if he could move on from this.

He doesn't put up with any carry on and is not afraid to speak out, Friday night, eviction night being a perfect example. Lisa was doing Nicole's hair over the barrier. Kat had peeled and mashed the spuds and put on the sausages for the hms dinner and then dashed off to wash and change before the evictions show. Mikey therefore was left in the kitchen trying to keep an eye on everything. He was giving the potatoes another mash and called to Nicole to come and check the sausauges (because obviously MIkey could not see if they were burning). Nicole said 'can't, getting my hair done, bring the pan over to me'. Bring the pan of boiling oil with sausages over to her? Asking a blind man to carry a pan of hot fat across a floor where he couldn't see any obstacles? Mikey rounded on her saying: bring them over to you! Get up of your arse and come and check them! (or words to that effect). Rex was most annoyed at MIkey speaking to his little princess in such a way but Mikey could have cared less. And fair play to him.

Mikey is the new head of house and absolutely relishing the power. He is very bossy and very verbal (at high volume) and as a result his week as hoh should be interesting and throw up some funny moments I think. If he would just stay away from Lisa and let his star shine. Mikey is favourite to win at the moment.

MO
Poor Mo really is getting a rough deal both in the house and as he is portrayed in the highlights programme each night. If you watch Mo on live feed he can be very funny, for instance this week before he got his suitcase back, he asked BB for sandals and socks as he considered it unhygenic to walk about the house and garden in his bare feet. BB asked what he would swap for these and he gave some belts and a pair of his underpants. Later, Mo was called to the diary room to collect his socks and sandals and BB presented him with a cute pair of pink socks (he had actually jokingly asked for baby pink when BB had enquired what colour) and a pair of ladies wedge healed silver sandals. BB told him he must wear them at all times and he took it in good part and watching him staggering around the house in his silver wedges was very funny.

NICOLE
Oh dear, what a spoilt little princess Nicole is showing herself to be. On one level I think she does want to throw herself into the house and house activities but on the other she is very lazy and does not want to do anything getting anywhere near work. In this she is ably supported by Rex who treats her as if she should be on a pedestal. She can be so sweet at times but then reverts to her petulant self if asked to do anything. Which is a pity because if she would just apply herself more I think she would be a popular hm.

RACHEL
Rachel is wearing me out. Her constant frown alternated with her twinkling dewy eyes look is driving me mad. She is such a worry wart and I can't believe this girl is going to take on the job of teaching secondary school children. They will tear her apart if she doesn't harden up a little. Yes, she can harden up if someone attacks Kat or Mikey but other than that she puts up with such crap from some of the hms, crap which would stop immediately if she rounded on them. But she doesn't and just gets herself upset about comments made. One other thing she is doing that annoys me is her treatement of Mikey. Honestly, if I hear her say Mikey Wikey one more time!!!

But fundamentally Rachel is a decent and nice girl and as I have said before, she would be a loyal and supportive friend. She just needs to be a friend to herself and stand up for herself much more.

REX
Rex has changed so much since girlfriend Nicole went into the house. He has just become a limpet constantly attached to Nicole, nuzzling and kissing her constantly. He is always bigging her up to others (except when they are having yet another tiff). Of course we still see flashes of the old, witty Rex, but currently he is so tied up in Nicole those times are getting fewer and fewer. And the funny thing about it is that I honestly believe Rex does not want Nicole in the house. To a degree she has stolen some of his thunder and Rex doesn't strike me as a person who gladly shares anything.

But he is right. Nicole being there has damaged his hope of being in the final ~ she is both his princess and his Achilie's heel ~ and there is a very real danger that should he be nomintated this week, he might indeed go on Friday. Which is a pity because I had thought he would make the final 4.

Rex, for all his bravado, is in my opinion very insecure underneath the veneer. I am lead to believe this because of the way he acts with Nicole. He is constantly saying how perfect she is, both to Nicole and to anyone else who will listen. This is all well and good but does he need to say it so often? It is like by making her appear perfect, he is a better person and someone to be envied because he is the 'owner' of this perfect princess.

He still retains his acebric wit but it is just buried under all that pink candyfloss at the moment and I hope it will cut through the stickiness and return in full force again.

SARA
Channel 4 is soon going to be the subject of thousands of law suits for deafness caused to the viewers by this NOISY Australian. She screeches and yells and screams at ear bursting decibels ~ and that is just saying she loves someone or something someone has done! She butters the hms up and everything, just everything, every hm does is cool and wonderful and clever and on and on and ON!

Sometimes I actually like her ~ she can be fun and funny ~ but what takes away from really liking her is that she refuses to express any opinions other than everyone is brilliant. This of course was a clever move earlier on as she sailed through nominations without ever being put up for eviction. But I have a feeling that the hms are at last seeing through her plan and she might see herself leaving the house in the next couple of weeks.

She is like a child who has overdosed on too many e numbers in cheap sweets and pop!

STUART
Bore No.1, Dale was evicted in the face off between himself and Stuart and so we are left with Bore No.2. He drones contantly about missing his daughter, how he will 'walk' so that he can be reuninted with her. After he was saved he went around clutching his hairy face with his painted nails hands, being careful not to smudge his eyeliner or mascarra, looking totally bereft whilst trying to supress a yell of 'YES!'. Who does he think he is fooling? Not the public anyway.

And then when he went back into the bedroom after his suitcase was returned (the hms facing the public vote must pack their stuff and give it to BB prior to eviction announcement). He opened the case sitting on the bedroom floor, took out the letter from his little daughter, paused to look wistfully at it (having made sure the cameras were on him), and then took out her picture and a little gift she had given him. A torn man, broken and sad and needing more than anything to see the love of his life, his daughter whom he has not seen in something like 10 weeks. And as our hearts bled for his plight, locked up as is ... he promptly turned around and got over his heartbreak in a nano second and put all his clothes away!

He is now THE most annoying hm in there. JUST GO STUART!